I think you've suffered enough. You've given enough. I think you deserve a chance to just... give up. You accepted his choice, that ending the pain was better than the pain. Why can't you give yourself that gift?
Madness string 94328
"It is better and more satisfactory to acquit a thousand guilty persons than to put a single innocent one to death." Maimonides argued that executing a defendant on anything less than absolute certainty would lead to a slippery slope of decreasing burdens of proof.