Madness string 433

Random mermaid
I thought the bamboo was dead... but part of me hoped I was wrong, that just because the foliage shrivelled up and died, there might still remain some life in the roots. So I kept watering it... but doubts nagged. So I dug it up. To check, you know? Turns out, I was right. It was still alive... except I probably killed it when I dug it up.

OHIO MUST BE ELIMINATED. THIS IS MERELY AN ESCALATION OF A FARCE BETWIXT MYSELF AND AN ASSOCIATE OF MINE.