Madness string 32556

Random mermaid
So many of the sources historians use to piece together the past are known fakes, but the best they can do is read between the lines or have no lines at all. There's a reason why medieval historians read farm reports featuring travel descriptions and saints' lives involving demons-living-in-buckets with the same attention to detail. Every dry history text you've read in your life comes from a pile of sources like this, bits of maybe-truth cobbled together with toothpaste and narwhal horn dust.

For animals, the entire universe has been neatly divided into things to a: mate with, b: eat, c: run away from, and d: rocks.