Madness string 122925

Random mermaid
Stop leaving peanut butter on toast out at night, for fucks sake. You won't get house hippos if you clean up after yourself. You'll probably need an exterminator, depending on how bad they're in there. They may be cute, but they absolutely destroy your drywall, and will fight any pets you might have. They're very territorial.

On the Metro, an individual sitting across from me looked me in the eye, took his 20 ounce Pepsi and turned it over above his head, rotating it around saying 'flies... FLIES... flies...' without breaking eye contact.