Madness string 122900

Random mermaid
Our caselaw recognizes two different interpretive tools concerning absurdity. The first, the absurd consequences canon, merely resolves an ambiguity by choosing the reading that avoids absurd results. The second, the absurdity doctrine, reforms unambiguous statutory language where the language would lead to an absurd result.

A Russian satellite full of geckos is floating around in space, and mission control has lost the ability to control it.