The two longest minutes in the world are waiting on your left over pizzas to reheat and watching a lame video while someone says 'Hang on, it's about to be funny.'
Madness string 111723
I mean, to quote the great academic paper of our time: Planes, Trains, and Plantains, the story of Oedipus, 'None of this makes much sense. Again, don't worry about it. This is a folk tale, not a God Damned Oxy-Clean commercial.'