Madness string 93496

Random mermaid
You ever know anybody who's just too nice? Then you realize it's annoying because they remind you of what you're not, that you'll never be as good as they are. And then you think, why can't I? And before you know it, that naive idiot you laughed at has made you a better person.

This might be a good case for teaching statutory construction, though it might also cause brains to explode.