Madness string 8123

Random mermaid
We found a little piece of heaven here. It is black, smooth, oblong. It hums a soft, but discordant note, and we are afraid to touch it.

I penned a scathing letter of complaint to the minister of agriculture, but the letter was returned to me. Am I the minister of agriculture? If so, how do I get this jerk to stop sending me complaint letters?