I'm sure that subjectively, time probably DOES stop when you're spaghetti.
Madness string 22661
The story happens because of the protagonist, not Palace Guard #2. I'm sure he's a great guy, and yes, he can be present in the story if he adds something, but I don't need his history and contact info.
I don't know what I would've done without the public library. The librarians were some of the only people anywhere that would treat me like an actual human.