You always ask yourself 'if I did something different, would they still be alive'. You can't change it, you never know if it really would have made a difference, but the feeling and the doubt...
Madness string 114665
There is a kind of laughter that sickens the soul. Laughter out of control: when it screams and stamps its feet, and sets the bells jangling in the next town. Laughter in all its ignorance and its cruelty. Laughter with the seed of Satan in it. It tramples upon shrines, the belly-roarer. It roars, it yells, it is delirious: and yet it is as cold as ice. It has no humour. It is naked noise and naked malice.