Madness string 111894

Random mermaid
He knows exactly why I don't want him my life, and it has been reaffirmed to him that he needs to stay away. I don't want a bond with him. He will never be able to fix the situation, I have exactly zero positive feelings about him, and he has nothing I want or need anymore. He's effectively already dead as far as I'm concerned, and I don't do necromancy.
I was looking out at the wall of a room but in my eye I was seeing infinitely, kind of like a never ending runway. Another time I thought I went too far because I had to close my eyes and these pulsing patterns were too much, and as I lay I think on my bed, in the fetal position, terrified and focusing on breathing, I had a sensation of going inside out, like a rubber glove you peel off your hand and the glove is left inside out.